Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Is this a joke? Or just a(n) horrible pun?

A young, gifted but impoverished actor is auditioning for a part in a cheesy flick along the lines of 'Gone in 60 Seconds' - let's call it 'Burn this Mutha Fucka', or 'Your mother sucks tail pipes in hell' - you get the idea. As to race, let's not even go there. No racism here. How could you even think it?

He is brought by the casting director to a movie studio back lot where there are three cars parked with clear cinematic intention.

The first is a way souped up something or other with a Chess theme going on, all black and white with freakin' awesome decals of kings, queens, knights and all that shit happenin'. Allroight! Chess...rawwwks! not...

The next is a super cool whatever the fuck is a cool way fast chick impressin' open top machine with a somewhat incongruous bowling theme; decals of pins, balls and all the other bowling nonsense - but it is a kick ass red metallic widow-maker of a car.

The third car is splendidly decorated with the most stylish and fanciful depictions of the house of cards imaginable, kings, queens, jacks, aces, hearts, diamonds, clubs. All beautifully wrought by hand. The paint work visible beneath the exquisite decoration is sadly the rusting brown shell of a '93 Honda.

The casting director gets into movie mode and rapidly, heatedly asks the actor:
"You're a car thief, you've got no time to lose, you need the fastest car, but it also needs to be the fastest car to get into, and you gotta hot wire it in seconds flat cos the cops gonna cap you like this" he says firing a starter's pistol and making the actor jump a couple of feet in the air - "which one?" he repeats stacatto.

"That's the one I'd jack" he says pointing at the...

I had fun thinking it up. But maybe I was just remembering something from elsewhere. Are they copyrighting jokes nowadays? Is there a JWAA - Joke Writer's Association of America?
I dedicate this joke to my brother!
There must be many more 'I'd' jokes out there.

But what brought this up in my mind was an image of a little flash movie of GWB's face morphed into that of Marlon Brando whipped brutally by Karl Malden. Screaming in pain. Yes. Why not? Whatever these deceased actors would have thought about this current regime, I think it very likely that they would have deplored and objected to these terrible inhumanities perpetrated by this government.
So can someone make that youtube movie for the world? It would be like an aspirin. Temporary relief from a whole heap of pain and misery. But it would get a point across.

How can I mix jokes and serious issues? Because I can - and life is like that...

Dub is like that...
I'll figure out how to tag this later. Kinda weird!

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